Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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