can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize