My brain says no but my pants say off.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
