If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
