OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
