I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
