Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize