Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
