It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
home. puking in laundry basket.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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