it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night