I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
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at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
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