Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
A+ Viking dick
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