only if we run a train.
done.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
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