If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize