You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
It's just like the Real World with babies
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
