were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Randomize
