I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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