You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize