Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I think we might need a safe word for this...
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
