im about as happy as oj after his trial
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
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