Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
