That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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