Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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