Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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