her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
