You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
