Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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