Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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