due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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