Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
it's like iHOP with fire
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Someone signed my nipple.
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