we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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