God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
