Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
It's Friday. Sex?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
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All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
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I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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