I just saw a hot homeless man
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
