I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
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I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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