fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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