The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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