He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
