Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
