U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
There r osticjed everywhere
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
