Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
