i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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