Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Dear god my vagina.
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