My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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