normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize