Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize