If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
