this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize