In the future we'll all be gay
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
