Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
