Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
