do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize